Early Bird Gets The Worm…I think

I’ve been getting up early every morning…

Ok I lied.

God has been getting me up early every morning. But that may not be true either.

Since this past weekend on retreat u have been up early every day and its stuck the last three days since I’ve been home. How’s that?

There are time I hate that. See I love waking up (to no alarm), stretching and looking at my phone (really who had alarm clocks anymore) and seeing the 9am or 10am numbers staring back at me.

Makes me feel like I’ve already accomplished some fantastic feat of the day.

But more recently its been the 6am and the 7am numbers that are staring back. And I have to admit – I kind of like it.

Since I don’t go to the gym/work til later in the mornings I now have time to lay in bed. Read the news. Snuggle with my stuffed animals. And I know longer stay up late watching important new television. Like Scrubs, The Office (don’t hate me – I’m not a fan – I watch it because its the only thing on at 10pm), and the horrible It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia.

Let’s break to talk about this show. My friends Joe and Carlos took me out one night and a group of people joined or table. For some reason one of the boys in this group was FASCINATED with how bad this show was and talked about it until one of his friends teamed him for wasting everyone’s time.

Funny that the show came on tv jut a few day later (or I stayed up later to watch it) and found it slightly amusing.

That went away fast. Seriously people. This show moves so fast and the characters are so….uniquely odd….that I who don’t have anxiety GETS anxiety and has to go to bed. Every time.

So really this waking up early is saving me from watching this work of art on the tube.

I realized this morning as I turned to cuddle my stuffed dog, Wrinkles, that this extra time could be spent with my new patio furniture (can I get a WHOOP WHOOP), which while my beautiful is efficient and cute – and I can start my day in Gods word.

Starting my day reading, snuggling and talking to my best friend while sitting amongst the flowers He formed.

Definitely beats It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia.

Enjoy your mornings friends. And may it also start by spending time with the one who adores you. (No…coffee doesn’t count.)

For Real?

Welcome friends. I’m so excited you’ve decided to join me on this vacation adventure. As many know – any vacation with me is SURE to be adventurous and so far that has remained TRUE. Ive been gone roughly 12 hours and have already laughed so hard my sides hurt. Let us start from the beginning. 

My amazingly beautiful friend J’Nette offered to drive me to the airport where, besides the angry man who wanted me to let him go first in line…just because, it went smoothly. 

With a packed flight I offered to be that girl who gets stuck next to the screaming baby. Mostly eating and sleeping…very little crying. But the best part by FAR was grandma and mom singing preschool songs at the top of their lungs. I laughed and they let me in on the fun but I must admit I was laughing from hysteria I believe. 

My four hour layover in Chicago was super easy and went by crazy fast. I watched my two seat partners fall in love on the short flight. 😉 He fell in love…she fell in ‘someone to listen while I talk about myself’. Poor guy. He should have asked for the digits! He looked back FOUR times after departing the plane. ;( 

Getting out of Detroit airport was a BLAST! Down the escalator to the 1st floor for baggage. Up the elevator to the 4th floor for parking/shuttles. Down a different elevator back to the 1st floor to the actual shuttles. Sign saying go to the left for Dollar car rental shuttle. That’s me! 15 minutes later…realized the sign should point to the right. Shuttle now boarded and an amazing driver who took all my luggage I was now seated nicely like a proper young lady in the back. Or I was laying down with my arms thrown off the sides and my feet on the seats in front of me. The driver and I then had a nice conversation. 

Driver: Dollar or Thrifty? 
Me: Huh? 
Driver: Dollar or Thrifty?
Me: You want a dollar fifty?
Driver: Dollar or Thrifty car rental? 
Me: Oh!!! Dollar. 

This conversation seemed more odd when I realized that they are in the same building…….

This was a GREAT experience! See you get to PICK your own car. You go to the aisle you choose (mid-size) and you get to choose your ride. I cheered and then when I got to my row…laughed HARD. 

There were three cars. 

I promise I’ll add photos later or you can check them on Facebook. 😉

Two of those cars were super old looking so I jumped at the ford fusion and off I went. The next couple came out and looked sadly at me as they saw their two choices. ;( Sorry friends! 

Finding the hotel was amazingly easy. I pulled up to the front office and two cars joined me. One pulled up to my bumper and one to my fender. Seeing as how there was no way I was leaving anytime soon I let them check in first. Hoping they’d move their cars so I could get out. Homeboy in front SCARED ME! Scared little white nerd at the front desk too. He wanted to pay in cash but not put down the deposit. White nerd insisted he follow the rules even giving him 10% discount an dropping the deposit by 50%. Well very scary homeboy left very angry. I moved to the counter and quickly bonded with white nerd. I love him! While finishing up scary homeboy walks back in. WN (white nerd) quickly gets my back and whispers my room number to me and points the way. 

I move my car and try to juggle two suitcases up the stairs. Impossible. They are like taking three steps in one…and the railing comes to your head. That’s a fun way to walk! So two trips up the stairs and I’m alive. Room at last. 

Curtains are wide open and seeing as how it’s midnight I decide to shut them. Oh. Just kidding they dont actually shut. Aaahahahaa! Of course not. Pulling a chair over I figure them out and fix the damage. Yeah! 

Bed. Please. 

Nope. 

Sheets are dirty. I figured it was a set in stain so I rub at it…and it wipes away. GROSS! Back down to the front desk I go. WN is devastated for me. But he can’t fix it himself…and he has no other room for me. So I ask for sheets. I can change them! Oops. He’s out. Ugh. 

While WN looks for clean sheets I go lookin for a beer. Now…I’m not a big drinker but i felt I earned this one. 45 minutes later and one amazing drive through and around U of M campus, and several convenience stores…I come home with water as no one sells alcohol. Probably better. 

Upon arriving there is one parking spot left. Odd that it’s in the middle of a row of handicap spots. I did figure out just then that it is a handicap spot. The sign however is in the midst of a tree and unseen. Probably a nice ticket for that in the morning. 

Opening my door I find clean sheets. YEAH! I change them and make the bed and now…I need a shower. I lock the bathroom door, start the shower, realize shampoo and conditioner would be great and turn to open the door. 

Go ahead and guess what has happened? Yep! I’m locked in. At this point I’m laughing so hard I’m crying. 10 minutes later I break out and can now retrieve my shower items. As I go to put the toilet lid down to place towels on it…it ends up on the ground. Silly me to think it was connected TO the toilet. It was then I glanced up and saw handprints on either side of the door…sorta painted on. Maybe I’m not the first to be trapped here. 

I opted out of the shower and opted in for a nice hot bath. The stopper…slightly broken. So now I have a nice clean floor from where the tub overflowed. And the tub…made for babies. So I’m sitting with my knees bent in cold water next to a broken toilet with the door wide open for fear of being locked in again…while I write this blog.  

And this is only the first 12 hours…of a 13 day trip! 

Burritto and a Brain

You know lunch is going to be great when the person you are meeting walks around the corner rolling their eyes as if they have been waiting for you to arrive for the past 20 minutes.

Bummer that you watched them pull into the parking spot the same time you did. After calling him out on that and making the sweet woman outside Chipotle laugh hysterically I went in for the wonderful Evan hug. And came out of it with arms dripping wet.

D-SGUSTING!

No air conditioner in the car makes for one sweaty Evan hug.

Can I say D-SGUSTING one more time?

The lady watching us was definitely getting entertainment with her lunch.

Laughter is amazing.

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People watching is one of my favorite things to do and people watching with Evan…well…he’s an 18 year old boy so it’s pretty much like hanging out with a middle schooler. IT’S HILARIOUS!

We had a blast and I definitely was embarrassed as I tried to take a picture of the building across the street and Evan felt like a girl sitting outside maybe thought that I was taking a picture of her so he motioned for her to smile. CREEPER? Yes.

Or when I pointed out a table outside of Mom’s from our church and Evan OVERLY leaned forward to look at who I was mentioning. When I pointed out that he shouldn’t look so HARD he then made binoculars out of his hands and continued to scope the surrounding area.

Middle school boy in an 18 year body.

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Chipotle has these amazing stories on their cups and I have to say I was pretty impressed reading the Chip Story. It was at this point of reading, laughing, and spitting out food between giggles that Evan had the brilliant idea that THIS WAS HIS NEW CAREER! Writing the stories on the sides of Chipotle cups.

Even better was reading the other side of the cup “Tasting for fame? Send your cup story to http://www.chipotle.com”

SERIOUSLY?! We have FOUND EVAN’S NEW JOB!

I can’t wait to get to work on a Chipotle cup story!!!

(here’s the link for those of you who KNOW you want to write a story!)

http://www.chipotle.com/en-US/fan-antics/stories/stories.aspx

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We ended lunch with a time I’d like to call “Wisdom from Within” where Evan opened his heart and shared some…dating tips?…with me. Or for me. Or something. But I literally had to write his words down as we discussed my past ‘relationships’. I was laughing SO HARD!

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Evan: Why aren’t you dating?

Me: Men are jerks.

Evan: Men aren’t jerks. You just pick the wrong ones.

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Evan: Why would you keep this up?

Me: Well…he possibly walked away…and I possibly had to prove he still liked me.

Evan: Men aren’t jerks….YOU’RE a jerk.

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Me: So I’m doing this great bible study and I really think it’s going to help.

Evan: You’re gonna be a nun.

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Evan: I don’t get it.

Me: He was pretty to look at.

Evan: We could get you a picture.

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Me: I’m good Evan. I don’t have to be looking for a husband.

Evan: You don’t want a husband? You want to DIE ALONE?!

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Evan: We need to find you a GOOD man.

Me: Oh?

Evan: Don’t shop savers. Shop retail.

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Me: Evan…seriously. I am GOOD single. I was happily living and doing my job. Then God…well I don’t know what He did.

Evan: God said “This is what it feels like to almost have somebody”.

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Every Thursday should have a lunch such as this!

LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU EVAN GILBERT!!!!!